Al Gore Admits To Killing Tupac

Gore during happier times.

'The ni*&a had it coming'

These were the words spat to the world's press as Albert 'Koon' Gore was escorted from his Nashville bungalow by Tennessee sheriff, Dix Herring.

The confession came during a drunken game of 'Strip-Twister' with newscaster Larry King.

'..I was kinda shocked at first, and tired, we'd both been awake for thirty-six hours, and at first I thought it was the rum talkin'. But then Al says, 'I'll be right back'. So he leaves me sittin' there on the kitchen floor, buck naked as a Spaniard. When he comes back, the guy's got a boner like an iguana and he's holdin' this gun. I says to him, that don't prove shit, and he starts laughin'. Which got me started, next thing we're makin' out on the roof and he shows me the footage on his phone...'

Mr King is currently being treated for 'brie addiction' at the Betty Fjord Clinic in Oslo.

Said footage which shows Gore 'beefin' with and then 'gunnin' Shakur was recently anonymously posted on Internet geek haven, 'YouTube', and received three separate honours for 'funniest video of the week'.

'I aint never done heard of this Sixpack Shaker, he's a musician right? Imma Garth Brooks man maself. All I know is that sommabitch Gore took a dump in ma cruiser when we picked him up. There was crap all over da seats n winda's, sick sommabitch'. I reckon he'd been eatin' some kinda cheese...', cried Sheriff Herring whilst picking fruit.

Responses from the black community have been swift and vague, a statement issued from children's entertainer Michael Jackson, decreed;

'Tupac was a huge influence not only on my self, but also the universe. He was a very handsome young man with amazing abs. I wish him in the best in his beautiful quest through the sunrise. Also, his rape while being imprisoned was not my fault.'

An interview with 'P Diddy' added little of interest;

'Ah well'.

Gore's trial will be shown live on HBO this summer.

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